


a dark world aches for a splash of the sun

by calums



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Alcohol, Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Alpha Harry, Alpha Liam, Alpha Zayn, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Anxiety, Beta Louis, Depressing Thoughts, Depression, Drug Use, Emotional Baggage, Emotional Hurt, Eventual Fluff, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Implied Sexual Content, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, M/M, Multi, OT5, OT5 - Relationship - Freeform, Omega Louis, Omega Niall, Omega Space, Pack Dynamics, Polyamory, Protective Niall, Random Bodyguards, Random Names for Management People, Sad Louis, Self-Esteem Issues, Self-Harm, Self-Hatred, Sexual Assault, Subspace
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-19
Updated: 2018-08-06
Packaged: 2018-12-04 02:00:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 18,748
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11545101
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/calums/pseuds/calums
Summary: Being the only Beta in the world's most famous band should be easy, right? Well, not when you're on suppressants and pretending to be a Beta when in fact, you're an omega. Long and behold, the life of Louis Tomlinson. (Also, make Niall stop caring so much about Louis, thanks.)or the 'beta!louis who is actually an omega' trope that everyone is craving





	1. choose your words cause there's no antidote

**Author's Note:**

> hello !! this is the first chapter to a probably long series :') this is the first a/b/o fic ive written so bear with me if there's any mistakes !! special thanks to my beautiful friend kayley who's answered me at 2 am whenever i sent her something to do with this fic lmao she's great :) anyways enough of me talking; happy reading !!! xx

"How does it feel like to be the only beta in the band?"

It's ironic that the most asked question towards  Louis is the question he really doesn't have the answer for.

How  _does_ it feel like to be the only beta in the band? It seems like these days it's getting harder and harder to hide the fact that  _he really doesn't know_.

He's sitting right next to Zayn, who's sitting next to Harry, who's sitting next to Niall, who's sitting next to Liam and he's wondering why can't he let himself be a part of something so good? Oh wait, their management will literally tear them all apart if Louis even breathes out the truth he's really not who they think he is. Right.

That really doesn't help the fact that the couch barely holds the five of them if it wasn't for Louis who decided to sit right on the armrest of the couch. Louis is an expert at avoiding any touches with the Alphas. The boys take it as a "beta" thing but in reality, Louis just doesn't want to feel the touch of an Alpha knowing he isn't allowed to enjoy it because he's supposed to be a beta, dammit.

Louis realized he's taking a bit too long to answer the simple question and he quickly comes up with an answer. "It's not too bad actually," Louis let's an easy smile grace his features.

Or however close Louis can make his smile look easy while a sharp stab of hurt hits his chest.

"Nothing's better than waking up and having half a dozen less of bodyguards than Niall has over here," Louis jokes, trying to get rid of the feeling of having his heart being ripped out of his chest.

Niall makes an offended nose and manages to lean over Harry and Zayn and smack Louis' knee.

After a bit more bickering between the boys, the interviewer manages to smoothly transition to asking the other four boys her other question. "And how does it feel like to be a pack with Niall while on tour, boys?"

At the mention of their Omega's name, the three alphas of the band smile brightly. "It's incredible," Liam decides to answer first, his eyes landing on Niall and his two other Alphas, "Nothing can beat the feeling of having the people you care for right there with you while you travel the world together."

Louis gets another wave of hurt when he knows the "having the people you care for right there with you" doesn't necessarily extend to him. I mean, c'mon, Louis is always being yelled at for his not so funny pranks while Niall gets away with almost anything. Louis doesn't blame them;

Liam looks at Harry and the youngest Alpha quickly catches on, "Yeah, we don't know what we'll do without each other."

Niall leans his head on Harry's shoulder and Louis' omega almost makes him whine.

 _Stop it_ , Louis digs his nails on the inside of his palms to push his omega right back into the corner where it belongs.  _You're a beta, fucking act like it_.

Of course, life hates Louis and the interviewer asks, "How did the three of you manage to do the claim on him?"

 _For fuck's sake_. Louis digs his nails dipper into his palm, his omega straining to get out of its restraints.

Zayn is quick to shoot down her question, though. "We don't like talking about the personal aspects of our claim."

The interviewer nods as if expecting that answer. It's not the first time the pack has been asked for the details on how they make it work. In Louis' opinion, they're just all so damn gone for each other that they'll give each other one of their organs if it comes to that.

It makes Louis want them more. 

—

The day goes by with plenty of more interviews. Questions varying from "Who's your favorite superhero?" to "How long do you plan on being together as a band?". Louis didn't say much, letting the Alphas and Niall answer. Louis would slip a sarcastic comment or a joke here and there but other than that he just tried to mask the hurt every time the pack was asked something about their relationship.

He's been doing it for the past four years, he can last a few more, right?

Louis flops down on the couch in their dressing room, pulling out his phone. He scrolls aimlessly on twitter, liking a few tweets before the rest of the band comes in. They said something about "dealing with Niall" in which Louis just rolled his eyes and nodded, making his way into their shared dressing room. They wanted Louis to have his own dressing room but Niall was not going to have it.

He went on a rampage of "abandoning their sweet little beta" and "being shitty best friends" if they separated themselves with Louis just because they were a pack without him. Louis didn't really care since Betas tend to be more independent but he couldn't argue with Niall with his Alphas right behind him.

Therefore, Louis finds himself awkwardly in the corner everytime Niall tries to include him in "pack stuff". It doesn't really work out but his efforts were still greatly appreciated.

Laughter from the halls interrupt Louis' pointless Twitter scrolling and the door to the dressing room opens up revealing the rest of the band. Louis looks up just and quickly gets an armful of post-mating Niall. Louis can literally smell the different scents of the Alphas all over Niall's body and it takes everything in Louis to not stuff his face in Niall's neck. Niall's hug is all awkward limbs in awkward places but Niall's laugh makes him forget  _almost_  everything. Louis mentally shakes his head.

"We were looking for you!" Niall squishes Louis' cheeks which makes Louis look like a gaping fish.

Louis lets out an unbelieving chuckle. "Really? Was this before or after you all decided to have sex?"

Niall's cheeks burn red and he swats Louis on the nose. "Shut it! It's an Alpha-Omega thing, you wouldn't understand."

Louis' smile dims just a little but he catches himself a second later _._

 _If only you knew_.

Louis breaks eye contact with Niall just to spot Liam, Harry, and Zayn standing awkwardly in the doorway having obviously watch Niall throw himself at Louis.

Instantly, Louis carefully pushes Niall off his lap and stands up. "Well, lads! I got to head and talk to Lisa about some stuff so I'll just leave the dressing room in your hands."

Niall makes a displeasing noise which quickly catches the attention of the three Alphas and they rush to replace Louis' empty spot on the couch. "But we wanted you to join us for dinner."

Louis falters.

Niall's sad tone instantly makes Louis feel like shit but he  _had_ to go meet up with Lisa because if he didn't, she'll add on to the lists of things he needs to do.

Louis takes in a breath. "Management stuff is more important." That was obviously the wrong thing to say because Niall makes another wounded noise. The warning growls coming from the Alphas makes the back of Louis' neck bristle.

_Be a Beta!_

That all goes down the drain once Liam starts speaking.

"If you didn't want to go to dinner with us then you should've just said so. Don't have to be an ass about it." Liam's cold tone makes Louis want to submit and that definitely isn't Beta behavior.

Louis furrows his eyebrows and glares at Liam. "I wasn't being an ass about it. It's not my fault I need to get things done in the band since you three are too busy dealing with 'pack stuff'." Louis regrets those words once they come out of his mouth but he just had to say _something_  to ignore the voice in his head screaming " _bad omega! bad bad bad!_ ".

Liam stands up from his spot with Niall and stands in front of Louis, close enough that Louis can touch him if he wan-  _No_.

Louis resists the urge to bow down his head and instead lifts his head up higher, forcing eye contact with Liam.

"Apologize to Niall." Liam crosses his arms and stares down heatingly at Louis. It takes everything in Liam's power to not bend the Beta over his knee and punish him for hurting Niall.

Louis scowls at the order. "You're not my Alpha." The words sound foreign in Louis' mouth but he doesn't waver.

Liam opens his mouth to retaliate but Niall stops him.  _Oh_.

When did Niall come over to stand next to Liam?

"Leave him alone. He's right." Niall states with a guilty look on his face.

 _Wait what_?

"We haven't been the best of friends to Louis-" Niall starts but is quickly interrupted by Louis. That gives him cold stares from the three Alphas but Louis doesn't care.

He will  _not_  let Niall blame himself over something that isn't even his fault.

"No no no, Niall, it's fine, you haven't done anything." He reaches for Niall but the warning sounds coming from the Alpha's throat has him retracting his hand.

"I think it's better for you to head to your meeting with Lisa, Louis." Zayn starts. Louis noticed Harry and Zayn haven't spoken since they walked into the room. He glances at Harry who's standing behind Niall but Harry just avoids eye contact with him.

"Fine." Louis speaks bluntly.

He walks calmly out the dressing room but once he makes it to the halls, he sprints down the corridors until he finds an empty storage closet and locks himself in there.

_Bad omega, bad, bad, bad. You really fucked up back there, you know that? Defying an Alpha's orders AND hurting Niall? Even Harry couldn't bear to look at you. You're such a pathetic excuse of an omega, no wonder your step-father put you on suppressants._

Louis curls himself up into a ball in the corner and squeezes his hands over his ears.

_Please just make it stop._

An hour later, he finds himself exiting the storage room with new scratches on his hips and thighs, adding on to the collection that started when he was 14. 

_—_

Louis finds himself sitting on a bar stool in a club located right in the middle of the city. After his meeting with Lisa, he had a choice of either going to a club or starting another dating rumor with a random model. Louis couldn't bare to think about the disappointing looks he'll receive from his band mates so he opted to get papped drunk at a club.

Louis knows he has a show tomorrow but Lisa could care less about his state when he performs.

Louis swallows another two shot and orders another four before he puts himself into another state of anxiety.

His bodyguard, Mark, stands a few feet away from him keeping a close eye on Louis. He finishes the four shots and nods his head to the exit, signaling he wants to go outside.

Louis sets one foot down from the stool or tries to because he immediately loses his balance and Mark has to hoist him up by putting his arm under Louis' shoulders.

Louis breaks into a fit of giggles. "Oi, Mark! Too many s-shots for one night?"

Mark shakes his head. "You're heading back to the hotel."

Louis furrows his eyebrows but in his drunk state, it makes him look cross-eyed. "Hotel?"

"Yeah, the boys said you opted for a hotel room tonight?"

Oh. Louis should've known they'd kick him out of the tour bus. He wonders what crap the Alphas are gonna deal with once Niall finds out. Not much, probably.

Louis hums. "Right, right."

Mark raises an eyebrow but asks no questions as he drags the drunk British Beta out of the crowded club. Once they make it out the back door, bright lights flash in front of Louis' face and he groans.

"Oi, you fuckin' losers! It's three am, what the fuck is up with the shitty camera lights?!"

Mark manhandles Louis into the car before he says something else that'll make the headlines in the morning. 

—

Louis wakes up with the urge to throw up.

He runs to the bathroom to empty his stomach, which isn't much since he didn't eat dinner. Or lunch. Or breakfast unless you count half a muffin.

Louis makes a disgusted face and turns to the sink. A look in the mirror and he knows Lou is gonna have to cover up his face using makeup again. Louis looks sickly pale and with the dark circles under his eyes, he might as well be the next Edward Cullen.

He quickly hops into the shower and brushes his teeth, ridding his body the smell of alcohol and sweat. He sees his bag of clothes on the counter and dresses in sweats and a t-shirt. His stylist could deal with his clothes later.

He walks outside the bathroom with his bag and places it on the bed. He takes out his neutralizing spray and puts a generous amount on his body. He rummages through the sides until he finds the small opening between the seams of the bag. He takes out a package of bright yellow pills and pops one in his mouth along with an Advil.

It's a routine nowadays. Take your suppressants and don't tell anyone. If you do, you'll get kicked out of the band and ruin everything.

_The fans, the band, everyone will know you're a lying piece of shit if your secret ever gets out. No one wants a broken omega._

That's what his step-dad told him, his mom, Lisa, and that stupid voice in his mind that always reminds him of the things he can't have. It's the truth. He doesn't know what he'll do if the boys hate him.

He has to lie to them every day to protect him. He can't let his stupid status be the reason the band breaks apart. It's crucial that Louis does everything in his power to hide the truth.

A knock resonated throughout the room and Louis quickly stuffs the pills in the seams and closes his bag.

"Who is it?" Louis yells.

The door slams open and an angry Niall bursts in.

Louis doesn't even have a chance to open his mouth before Niall jabs a finger at his chest.

"Did you or did you not ask for a hotel room?" Niall is fuming. If he was an animated character, steam would be coming out of his ears.

"I did." Louis says with what he hopes is confidence in his voice.

"Bullshit!" Another jab to the chest. "They kicked you out, didn't they?!"

Louis stays silent.

Niall lets out a string of curses and grabs Louis' arm. Louis tries to ignore the tingle he feels once Niall's warm skin makes contact with Louis' own cold skin. "That's it, they crossed the line." Niall drags him out the hotel room and down the hallway.

Louis' chest fills with anxiety. "W-wait, where are we going?"

Niall rolls his eyes like it's obvious. "They're going to apologize to you. It's one thing being mad at you, but kicking you out of the bus? No way in hell I'm letting them get away with that."

Louis plants his feet on the ground, trying to stop Niall's fast pace but failing. "Niall, it's fine. It's not like they haven't done this before."

That makes Niall stop and give Louis an incredulous look. "What?! What do you mean they've done this before?"

Louis winces. "It doesn't matter, it's fine."

That clearly wasn't the right thing to say because Niall increases his pace and soon enough they're right in front of the tour bus.

 _Fuck_.


	2. life's too short to even care at all

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i couldn't contain myself and i had to post the next chapter :') thank you so much to the people who commented and gave kudos !! that really motivates me to get the next chapter done faster <3 enough of me rambling; happy reading !!! xx

  
Niall barges in without warning, startling the three Alphas sitting around the small kitchen area of the tour bus. Louis is immediately hit with the strong scent of the three Alphas and the sweet smell of Niall. His inner omega almost bursts with excitement but Louis digs his nails into his palms. 

Louis aims for taking a few puffs of air through his nose and breathing out through his mouth. He doesn't want to do something stupid like stuffing his face in one of the Alpha's neck.

No, he doesn't want to do that.

Harry is the first to notice Louis but he quickly averts his gaze down to his cup of coffee.  _What is up with him_?

Louis ignores the sting of pain in his chest and instead stands behind Niall trying to look unbothered.

Can Niall please let it go?

"You three are  _ridiculous_." Niall starts, staring each of his mates down with such anger that they actually look down guiltily.

Of course, he can't let it go.

"Instead of dealing with your problems like  _mature_  Alphas, you send Louis to a hotel room  _alone_  because you can't deal with the fact that you're shitty band mates!" Niall huffs out his words with frustration and pulls Louis to stand next to him. That forces Louis to be exposed to the three Alphas. 

"He could've been kidnapped from his hotel window! He could've gotten hurt! You didn't even think to send a bodyguard to stand outside his hotel room?!"

Liam's eyes flicker to Louis for a fraction of a second but Harry still has his eyes on the cup. For a moment it looked like Liam looked... guilty?

_No. Stop it._

Louis has an unreadable expression on his face as he faces the three Alphas in the room with wavering confidence.

Zayn is the first one to stand up, keeping a small distance between Niall and Louis. He pauses as if collecting his thoughts.

"Ni, we didn't mean to upset you."

Niall scoffs. "I'm not the one who got kicked out the bus for a stupid argument."

Zayn sighs and his gaze turns towards Louis.

Louis feels his palms start to get sweaty. The Advil didn't really do anything to dim his headache and he's suddenly feeling very tired. It doesn't help the fact that Zayn's staring at him with a regretful look on his face.

"Louis, we're sorry for sending you to a hotel room. It was unnecessary and unacceptable. Not a good way to deal with something so simple."'

Liam clears his throat and tries to make eye contact with Louis. Keyword, tried. "We hope you can forgive us."

Liam taps Harry's fingers that are placed on his cup of coffee. Harry looks up to try and meet Louis' eyes for a tiny moment. "Sorry, Lou. We didn't mean it."

Louis bites his lip as he feels his gut twist uncomfortably.

_They don't really care about you. They're only apologizing because Niall told them to. They could care less about your stupid mess of emotions._

Suddenly, Louis doesn't want to be in the room anymore.

He wrenches his arm out of Niall's grasp and makes his way out of the tour bus with a horrible feeling of wanting to cry. He swallows down the lump in his throat as he wipes his sweaty palms on his sweatpants.

Niall makes a startled noise and is quick enough to follow Louis out. The choruses of "Louis?" coming from the tour bus do nothing to slow down Louis' pace. In fact, he actually speeds up to try and get to his hotel room as quick as he can.

He was suffocating in that tour bus. The combined scents of Liam, Harry, and Zayn were too much and the headache Louis has had since the moment he woke up only increased. The guilty looks they were sending him only made him feel even worse

_Bad Omega! You aren't supposed to make your Alphas feel like shit. It's all your fucking fault!_

Not my Alphas, not my alphas, not my alphas, not my-

"Louis?"

Louis didn't even realize he stopped walking and ended up in between another set of buses. He had his arms wrapped around his body, his hands resting under his armpits. The sharp sting of his nails digging under his arms relaxed him a little but not enough to keep his voice from shaking.

"I'm fine." Louis managed to get out. His back is facing Niall and it's better that way. He doesn't think he can face him right now.

"No, you're not." Niall frowned. "The boys are worried about you-"

Louis lets out a dry chuckle. It sounds wrong. "No, they're not, Niall. They're worried that I'm gonna  _hurt_  you again."

Niall's frown gets deeper. "You never hurt me."

Louis shakes his head. "Clearly, that's not what Liam, Harry, and Zayn think."

"Who cares about what my Alphas think.  _You've never hurt me, Lou_." Niall takes a tentative step closer to Louis, but once Louis hears Niall's foot hit the ground, he takes one step farther away from him.

"I think you should go back to your Alphas." Louis doesn't miss how bitter he sounds when he says "your".

_You're pathetic. The Alphas don't even want you so stop trying for something that'll never happen._

Louis is filled with sadness. He hates that he has to do this but Niall just doesn't understand. He can't handle being in the same room with the people he loves only to be reminded that he  _can't have them_.

For the sake of Niall, for the sake of the Alphas, for the sake of the band and their fans and everyone else he doesn't want to disappoint, he has to do this.

Niall furrows his eyebrows. "Louis-"

"Niall." Louis turns around to face him and Niall flinches at the sadness and something else he can't point out in Louis' eyes. "I think it's better if you stop trying to ask me to join 'pack stuff'. We both know the Alphas don't want me there. Save your breath, please."

Louis doesn't give Niall the chance to reply before he's already walking away, trying to get to the small and lonely hotel room.   


—  


Louis didn't realize Niall told the Alphas about their little conversation until it was 5 minutes before their show started. Throughout the whole day, Niall seemed to want to talk to Louis but one of the Alphas always pulled him back.

_Probably because they don't want their pure Omega hanging around a defective Omega._

This time though, Niall managed to get a hold of Louis and he spent it telling Louis that "my Alphas wouldn't let me talk to you" and "I wanted us to go eat lunch tomorrow together" before Harry came in and swept him away. If it wasn't for Liam telling Harry to get Niall, Harry wouldn't have done it.

It wasn't like Louis was going to say yes. He can't remember the last time he ate a full meal and he's pretty sure he already lost a couple of pounds.

Not like Niall who has his Alphas to make sure he eats three meals a day. He wishes he had people to take care of him but he's supposed to be Beta.

Fucking hell.

Louis was in the middle of putting in his ear piece before Liam came up and grabbed his shoulder, turning him around so he was forced to be face to face with Liam.

"What's going on with you, Louis?"

Louis was taken aback by the sudden anger coming off the Alpha.

"I'm sorry?"

Liam rolled his eyes, annoyed. "You know what I'm talking about. You've been acting like such a douchebag these past few days and it's unacceptable. Whatever it is that's going on with you, you better fix it."

Louis pushes Liam's hands off his shoulder. He can't believe how much he regrets that decision. It's pathetic how much he wants Liam to touch him even when they're arguing. Fuck.

_Stop upsetting your Alphas!_

Louis mentally shakes his head, trying to come up with  _something_  to say to the Alpha. What would a Beta do? He fights the urge to bare his neck in submission and instead settles with lifting his head up to face Liam's harsh stare.

"I'm being the douchebag?"  _Stop talking back! "_ Speak for yourself."  _Stop angering your Alpha!_

Louis wills his omega to just shut up for once and let him do whatever the fuck he wants.

Obviously, Liam doesn't take Louis' response well and his eyes flash red. Louis bites back the whimper that threatening to slip past his throat and digs his nails into the palms of his hands.

_Fuck, fuck, fuck._

Liam takes a challenging step closer which has Louis holding his breath. Louis could see every single perfection on Liam's face and he hates how much he wishes he could just lean up and brush that stupid stray hair that's fallen over his forehead.

_Do it!_

Nothing happens the stage manager starts yelling that twenty seconds are left until they're needed to be on stage. Liam reluctantly steps back and goes to join his pack who were cautiously watching the whole situation play out.

Louis feels his face burn red as he's the last one to head onto the stage.

Once they were playing their last song and walking off the stage, Louis thinks it's safe to say that tonight's show was probably one of the worst ones they've done. The tension between the band is uncomfortably thick that even some fans in the front row looked confused.

Liam wouldn't even talk to Louis and Harry always made it his quest to stay on the other side of the stage from where Louis was. Zayn ignored Louis completely and Niall was struggling to keep the atmosphere light.

Louis' anxiety was sky rocking to the roof. He couldn't keep his hands from shaking and he kept on singing a second too late when it came to his part in the songs.

It was horrible.

He knew it'll catch up to him later in the night but Lisa called right after the show ended to tell him he has to head to a club tonight and that a car is already waiting in front of the venue with Mark.

He hates his life.  


—   


Niall couldn't stop thinking about Louis. The way he'd tighten his fists and his back would go rigid made Niall's omega go haywire. And he doesn't fucking know why.

The whole day, he's been trying to talk to him but his Alphas told him to give him his "space."

To be more specific, "He's a beta. Betas need space to come to terms with their problems." Niall wasn't having it. It sounds wrong giving Louis space. Louis is too tiny and self-conscious to be left alone. 

The whole show, Louis was keeping his distance but it felt wrong. Niall misses Louis sarcastic comments and his carefree nature. The show was noticeably different and that's what convinced Niall there was something seriously wrong with his Louis. 

Yeah,  _his_  Louis. 

His Alphas might not see it but sometimes Louis acts more like an Omega than a Beta.  


The conversation he had with Liam five minutes before the show proves that. The way he'd challenge Liam is the same thing Niall would do for his Alphas to give him attention when he's upset.

The chance of Louis acting out because he's upset pulls a string in Niall's heart. Louis isn't one to put his emotions out into the open and he doesn't appreciate Liam acting so coldly towards him. Heck, almost all the three Alphas were acting coldly towards Louis and if Louis is going through some issues, he should have at least someone helping him through them.

Niall doesn't care if Louis doesn't like talking about his feelings or if he doesn't like cuddling or if he doesn't want anyone touching him at all. Louis is probably too scared to ask for any of those things so Niall is going to hand all those things to him and open up a window for Louis.

Niall knows he's dealing with Louis' problems in an omega way but sometimes your biological status doesn't represent what you truly want. For example, Harry is more of a submissive Alpha. He likes pack cuddles more than the other two Alphas and he's less controlled by his Alpha nature. Of course, Harry has his moments where his dominance overpowers him but Liam is always there to put him in his place.

In Louis' case, Niall notices that he acts a bit more submissive than his other fellow Betas and Niall's omega nature wants to bring that side of him out more.

But first, he has to find a way to talk to him without his Alphas behind him. And also maybe force his Alphas to see that there's something wrong with their Louis.   


_Their_  Louis.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> to clear up some things; liam treats louis as a beta not an omega which is why every time louis challenges him, he takes it as an insult to his status.


	3. and so i run to the things they said could restore me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello! i decided to bless you all with a third update in one week! this chapter is a bit more heavy than the past two chapters so please please please read at your own risk! your mental health is much more important than reading this fic! also, thank you to my wonderful friend zoe, (@dismantledsun), for being such a lovely supporter from the start, she's incredible <3 enough of me rambling: happy reading!! xx

Louis is so fucking tired.

He doesn't even have the energy to talk so he's just sitting there on the bar stool. He already took a few shots (more than he can count) and his surroundings are turning into mushy colors and shapes. Thankfully, he has no shows for the next two days but that just means more publicity stunts to do.

The stunts were supposed to be carried out by the pack for more publicity but Louis doesn't want to see the fallout of the pack. He loves them too much to do that to them.

_They still hate you for disrespecting them today._

Louis shakes his head but quickly regrets it once his world starts spinning. He gets off the bar stool carefully and grabs on to the empty chairs to drag himself to the bathroom. He locks himself in a stall and blinks to try and get rid of the black spots in his vision.

His stomach is twisting painfully and the urge to throw up is on the tip of his tongue. His eyes water as his empties his stomach into the toilet for the second time that day. He can barely hold anything in nowadays without him throwing it up.

He hears someone enter the bathroom but Louis is too disoriented to check who it is. The sound of the door lock rattling confuses Louis and he shakily stands up from his kneeled position on the floor only to be pushed backward and land painfully on the sharp edge of the trip lever of the toilet.

Louis lets out a pained gasp as he gets manhandled against the wall. Louis' senses catch up with him and his mind screams ' _Alpha!'._

Louis scrambles to get away from the person but his uncoordinated movements make him flail his limbs around pointlessly. He hears a scruff voice tell him to "shut up" and "be a good little slut" and Louis' eyelids start to droop.

_No! Stay Awake!_

He feels two hands grope his body and he whines uncomfortably, not even bothering to hold back such Omega cries for help. He feels his chest seize up and his headache get worst as he feels himself being stripped away from his dignity.

He kicks out his leg sharply and it stuns his attacker momentarily, giving Louis the chance to slip past his attacker and stumble out the stall. The stumbling causes Louis to twist his ankle and he bites back the wounded sound threatening to slip past his lips.

He ignores the pain of his ankle and he rushes to get out the bathroom. His attacker is right on his heels but Louis pushes through the bathroom door which catches the attention of Mark, his bodyguard. Mark quickly moves from his spot on the side of the crowd and rushes to lift up Louis who has fallen on the floor.

Louis' headache is killing him and his ankle burns with pain; he can barely hold himself up. His blinks, trying to regain his consciousness but it's taking too much of his energy. He sees Mark's mouth moving but no sounds come out.

_What?_

Louis passes out. 

—

Liam is in the middle of fixing the pack bed in their tour bus when Niall comes in. Niall stands at the entrance of their small bedroom located at the front of the bus and watches Liam with an annoyed stare.

It takes Liam about three seconds to realize this won't end well. Nothing ends well when Niall is annoyed at you.

"We need to talk about Louis."

Liam fluffs a pillow. "Okay."

Niall raises an eyebrow. "Like, talk,  _talk_ , about Louis. Have a serious conversation about our fellow band mate and best friend type of talk."

Liam fits the covers over the bed. "I know the definition of talk, love."

"Then stop fixing the bed and pay attention! And don't call me 'love'! You don't get to use that card on me!"

Liam sends Niall a warning look, "Watch it."

Niall huffs and throws his hands up in a 'I can't believe you!' type of way, "You don't get to tell me to watch it when you haven't even been watching out for Louis, you hypocrite! I don't know what's up with you, Liam, but you've been acting super shitty towards Louis."

"He's been testing my limits, Niall."

"Limits? What the hell are you going on about?"

Liam rolls his eyes like it's obvious. "I don't know if it's just Louis being Louis but he's been acting out lately and someone needs to keep him in check. Just because he's a Beta, it doesn't mean he can do and say whatever the hell he wants without a consequence. If that means calling him out on it then so be it. "

Niall stands there looking at Liam like he's the most stupidest person in the world.

Liam gives Niall a confused look, "What?"

"Maybe the reason Louis is 'acting out' is because he's going through something and has no way of letting out his emotions. You know Louis. He's not the type of person to just go up and tell you the truth on what he's feeling," Niall pauses, "Ignore Louis' status as a Beta. If you haven't noticed, half the time Louis doesn't even act on his Beta instincts and maybe we've been reading him wrong the whole time."

Liam furrows his eyebrow and pauses his movements. "What do you mean?"

This time, it's Niall's turn to roll his eyes."He's more submissive than most Betas I've met. Like, the way he picks up an argument is sort of the basic Omega signal for 'you aren't paying enough attention to me!'. Does that ring a bell to your latest argument with Louis? "

Liam would be lying if he hasn't noticed Louis act a bit different than other Betas. Liam probably thinks that's one of the reasons why Liam has the urge to discipline Louis every now and then. Of course, Liam doesn't because Louis' a Beta but now that he thinks about it, Louis  _does_  act a bit submissive.

"Okay, if that's the case, then why did Louis tell you to basically leave him alone when he stormed out of the bus the other day?"

Niall lets out a frustrated noise, "Because he's  _Louis_! For fuck's sake, Liam, you can be so fucking daft sometimes."

Liam decides to ignore the constant insults that Niall is throwing at him. He'll deal with that later. "That doesn't answer my question."

"Because he doesn't want to talk about his feelings," Niall explains annoyed, "Aren't you supposed to be the smart one in the band?"

Liam huffs. Again with the insults. "Fine, I'll talk to him about it."

"You better."

"But first, I'm going to have to deal with your constant trash talk. You really thought I was going to let it go, did you?"

Niall tries his hardest not to show his excitement. If there's one thing Niall loves doing, it's angering his Alphas to the point where they need to put him right back into his place.

Half an hour later, Niall is left with a pink bum covered in soothing cream and his three Alphas cuddling him on the couch with a movie playing on their flat screen.

Liam hasn't forgotten his conversation with Niall, though, and he realizes his Omega is right. He needs to find a better way to find out what's wrong with Louis without pushing him back further into the hole he dug himself into. 

—

Louis is in his hotel room when he wakes up.

There's a throbbing pain in his ankle and he's pretty sure there are bruises on his sides. There's barely any light coming from the window so Louis guesses it's in the early hours of the morning.

"Great, you're awake." Louis didn't even notice Lisa leaning by the door entrance. "Took you long enough."

Louis winces as he feels a sharp pain go up to his head. "W-what happened?"

Louis spoke too soon though because, one by one, memories from last night flashed through his mind like a broken movie script. Everything is fuzzy but Louis can make out Lisa making him go to a club again, getting drunk, heading to the bathroom, hearing someone open his stall, and-  _holy shit_.

Louis' eyes widen as his heart rate starts to pick up. What's going to happen now? Is he going to have to hide this? Who knows what happened to him? Where's Mark?

He didn't realize he was voicing his thoughts out loud nor his throat getting clogged up.

"Now, now, don't get ahead of yourself. We both know no one can find out about what happened. What occurred in that club, stays in the club, you hear me?"

Louis nods numbly, suddenly feeling sick.

"I already made Mark sign a contract to stay silent about what happened. It's bad press and there's no way I'm letting your reckless drinking get in the way of ruining the band. You already have your status to hide, I can't believe you've added another thing to the list. You don't want the fans hating you more, do you, Louis?" 

Louis quickly shakes his head, his anxiety creeping up higher every second she's in the room.

"Good boy," Lisa smirks. It sounds wrong hearing the wrong Alpha call him a "good boy" when all he ever wants is-  _no_.  _You can't think about them. They're better off without you and your stupid baggage._

"Glad, we're on the same page," Lisa starts and stands up straighter. "The band has the next two days off, put some ice on your ankle if you care about healing quicker, pretty sure you sprained it, and oh, if anyone asks, you hurt your ankle dancing in the club."

She leaves without another word and Louis waits until he hears her footsteps retreat down the hallway before he bursts out crying.

Snot-filled, loud, ugly kind of sobbing.

He sits up slowly and grabs his bag from where he left it a few hours ago on the bed and hurriedly shuffles through it until he finds a hoodie. It isn't his hoodie, it's Liam's. He inhales the scent of the Alpha, more tears spilling over his cheeks and onto the fabric.

_Pathetic, so fucking pathetic._

He knows hiding his true status from the pack is bad. So fucking  _bad_. He's been lying to them for years, he'll be surprised if they even want him in the band. Deep down, he knows it's selfish to hide it from them but the thought of them hating him more than they already do is too much for him.

He can't lose them and he's disgusted at how selfish he sounds.

So fucking  _disgusted_.

He sniffs loudly as he slowly eases himself out the bed, leaving the hoodie on the bed and limping towards the bathroom. He walks in and what meets him in the mirror doesn't surprise him. His eyes are bloodshot red, his skin as pale as he feels, his cheeks are hollowed from the weight he has lost, and his hair is a greasy mess.

_It's what you get for fucking up so badly. Don't even try putting some ice on your ankle, you deserve the pain._

Louis eyes water again as he switches his weight to his sprained ankle, biting his lip as pain surges up his foot.

_I do deserve the pain._

_—_

Louis spends most of the early hours of the morning curled up in a ball in his bathroom, holding Liam's hoodie to his chest. He went back to his bed to go retrieve it, purposely adding pressure to his injured ankle before heading back into the bathroom.

He also got his bag and placed it on the counter, knowing he'd have to head to another meeting with Lisa. It wasn't until the clock on his phone hit 9 a.m. did he realize he'd have to get up at some point.

His hands itched to scratch at his hips again, even though the bruises and previous scratches were already causing some pain. He feels revolting.

Every time he remembers a glimpse of the Alpha placing his hands on his body, he would shiver, harshly rubbing at his skin raw until it turned a bright red.

He couldn't stop.

It feels like his pain is inevitable. That no matter what happens, he'll always have to deal with the hurt and harshness that comes with his decisions. He's so  _tired of it_.

But, Louis knows he has to deal with it either way. Lisa would do so many dirty, bad, and horrible things to the boys if Louis doesn't follow her instructions. He's doing this to protect them, to protect Niall, his fans, his career. Hiding this is everything. One wrong slip and it's gone.

That's the reason why Louis gets into the shower, changes, and heads to his meeting with Lisa.

He can't fuck anything up more than it already is. 

 

—

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> and so the plot thickens *dun dun dun!* i never realized how hard it was to keep things interesting until i started writing this story wow ?? i'm trying super hard to make this fic a bit different from the others so sorry if it seems like a mess right now !! xx


	4. open your eyes and see the way our horizons meet

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> recap: louis is left with a sprained ankle and a horrible mishap at a club while niall tries to convince liam that something's up with louis

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it's been a month i'm sorry!! i got a new laptop (phew i was dying w/out it) but i've also started college :( i'm 14 so that's a big change from just coming from middle school but i'm getting the hang of it! the comments and support i've been getting on this story make me super happy omg thank you so much for liking it!! enough of me rambling, happy reading!! xx
> 
> side note: all typos are mine rip

The pack slept in until the clock hit 11 a.m. Having today and the next day off gave the pack a chance to get some well-needed rest.

Niall lets out a yawn as he slowly wakes up. He's in the middle of Harry and Zayn, Liam nowhere to be seen. The sounds of clanging metal coming from the kitchen state otherwise.

Niall manages to untangle himself from the mess of Zayn and Harry's arms and makes his way into the kitchen area where Liam is making breakfast. Niall lets out a snort as he walks in on Liam trying to flip a pancake on the pan, failing miserably.

"Li, there's a spatula for a reason," Niall giggles, walking towards him. He gives Liam an over exaggerated kiss on the cheek as he uses his hips to push Liam away from the stove. He loves the boy but he can be a bit of an airhead sometimes.

Liam huffs, "I know that."

Niall raises an eyebrow as he fetches the spatula from one of the cabinets. "You sure?"

"Definitely," Liam grins and places a quick kiss on Niall's lips before heading to the fridge to prepare the other foods.

Soon, Harry and Zayn wake up and by then, breakfast is ready. The pack eats breakfast, the three Alphas making sure Niall eats all of his food, which, of course, isn't a problem since Niall could probably eat three cows in one sitting. But, the Alphas still like to make sure their Omega knows he's being taken care of.

It's the thought that counts.

They pack have a choice of either staying on the tour bus all day or go out somewhere. The last option seems less likely considering the fact that the fans are crowded around the venue they're currently parked at. It's fine though, they don't mind meeting a few fans.

The boys were about to go out the door of the tour bus but Niall stops in his tracks.

"Wait, where's Louis?"

Zayn stops too and furrows his eyebrows, "Didn't he head to a club last night?"

Liam sighs, "Even when he's on break he needs to go clubbing."

Niall hits Liam's chest, "Li, shut up. I'm really worried about Louis and it seems like all you do is judge him."

Liam tries to fight back the small guilt biting at his heart prevents him. It isn't that he doesn't care about Louis. It's that he physically can't care too much because if he does, with Louis being a Beta, it might turn ugly fast.

A beta craves for its independence but when it's partnered with an Alpha's nature to protect, the Beta feels threatened when its independence is questioned. Liam wants to stay on the safe side of things.

That's what he told his pack anyway and the reason they've been keeping their distance from Louis. To keep Louis from feeling threatened. Yeah, that's it.

Harry bites his lip as he tries to stop the incoming argument between his mates, "Well, if he isn't here, shouldn't he be at his hotel room? I think he got the room for a few days."

Zayn runs a hand through his hair, "Then let's go talk to him. I've been feeling something isn't right with him. Haven't you?"

"Thank you!" Niall exclaims, throwing his hands up in the air.

Liam bites his lip. This is what he was trying to prevent but clearly, that isn't going to work. It's Louis. You never know anything with Louis.

This could end in two ways. Louis either tells them what is wrong with him or he doesn't.

Worst case scenario? Louis ends up hurting one of his mates with the carelessness of his words. Or Liam getting worked up and going off on Louis, again. Maybe accidentally do something an Alpha shouldn't do to a Beta.

Fuck.

His mates stared at Liam expectantly as they waited for his decision. "What if he doesn't tell us what's wrong?"

Niall huffs, "Then we make him. I'm not leaving that hotel until he tells us."

Harry and Zayn gesture to Niall.

"Basically," Zayn says.

Liam sighs, knowing he isn't going to win. "Fine. Even though I don't see Louis telling us."

Niall rolls his eyes and makes his way to the hotel. The bodyguards at the hotel kept the fans at bay while they all took a few pictures with a few fans before taking the elevator and going up to Louis' hotel room.

Niall knocks on the door, "Louis! Open Up!"

Niall taps his foot on the floor and crosses his arms, his Alphas lingering in the hallway. They get no response so Niall knocks again. "Louis!"

Liam sniffs the air and shakes his head. "He's not here."

Zayn says, "Where is he then?"

Harry shrugs and makes his way down the hallway to the elevator. "Maybe he started his day earlier than us?"

Liam checked the clock on his phone. "It's 1 p.m."

Niall sucks in air through his teeth, "Oh, yikes."

They all got into the elevator and pressed the button for the main lobby. "We'll catch up with him later," says Liam.

Niall crosses his arms and pouts.

Liam sighs, "What now, Niall?"

"He's avoiding us."

"No, he isn't."

"Yes, he is!"

"No, Niall. He isn't."

Harry and Zayn lean against the wall of the elevator, amused. Liam and Niall continue to go back and forth until the elevator door opens.

Louis stands there, favoring his right leg over his left, his eyes wide as four pairs of eyes turn towards him.

"Louis!" Niall breaks the silence as he runs out the elevator to jump into Louis' arms. Louis lets out a startled squeak as the pressure on his injured ankle increases as he tries to get a hold of Niall. Niall quickly pulls back with furrowed eyebrows and stares down at Louis' right ankle.

Which is suspiciously bruised than his other ankle.

"Louis, what happened?"

"I had too much fun on the dance floor?"

"Louis,"

"I'm telling the truth! Honest," Louis crosses his heart with one hand as Niall glares at him.

"Why are you standing? Someone tell me why he's standing with a broken foot," Niall says.

"My foot isn't broken!"

Louis' protests are left in the dust as Zayn comes over and picks him up by the waist, so he's dangling over his arm and Louis' stomach is pressed against Zayn's arm.

Louis yelps and tries to push Zayn's arm off of him but Niall shushes him loudly.

"Your foot is broken and we're going to heal it."

"Niall, it's not even broken, it's sprained!"

Liam, Harry, Niall, and Zayn ignore Louis as they all pile into the elevator again to head up to Louis' hotel room.

Half an hour and a pile of ice packs later, they're all piled into Louis' queen sized bed. They can barely fit but Niall is cramped up between Zayn and Liam and he isn't complaining. Louis is in the middle of the triad, his back against the headboard and his foot propped up by multiple pillows while Harry lays at the end of the bed.

"So, how did you break your leg?"

Louis was over correcting Niall and he just sighed, "Love, I told you, I sprained it while I went out clubbing."

Niall huffs. "Sure you did. When did you ever come back to the hotel? Don't tell me you walked out there with your foot like that."

"Mark helped me."

Liam saw the flicker in Louis' eyes and the small waver in his voice. If he had blinked, he'd probably miss it.

"You're lying," Liam said. There was no uncertainty, it was stated as a fact.

Harry and Zayn perked up at the accusation and they curiously stared at Louis.

The amount of attention Louis was getting made his cheeks go hot and he shook his head, his hands unconsciously digging into his palms.

"How am I lying?" Louis managed.

Liam's eyes flickered down to Louis' chest, where he noticed the uneven movements of his breathing. His eyes flickered up to meet Louis' as he tilted his head to the side.

"I just do."

"Well, you're wrong," Louis bit back.

Louis stared at an empty spot on the bed, his hands hurting at the amount of pressure he was pushing against his palm. He shouldn't have said that with that much venom. Why couldn't they just leave it alone? He wants to do anything but think about that uncomfortable situation at the club. Right now, the scents of three Alphas and sweet smelling Omega was enough to calm his nerves.

He just doesn't know how long that will last.

Zayn took a different approach.

"Is there anything you need to tell us, Lou?" Zayn's voice was soft and soothing and Louis almost told him the truth.

Almost.

"No," Louis huffed out, their prying making him feel wary and anxious. The familiar feeling in his throat was building up and he swallowed it down not wanting to do something stupid like cry.

Harry noticed and he sat up from his position of laying down, noticing something was definitely up with the Beta. "Louis?"

Louis stayed silent this time, not trusting his voice. He pulled the blanket around him closer to his chin as he tried to breathe evenly through his nose.

His skin prickled and suddenly the places where the crude Alpha touched him seem to warm up and feel uncomfortable.

Louis shifted down the bed, the feeling getting too much to handle. "I'm going to get some water."

Niall whines softly in the back of his throat. "But there's something you aren't telling us, Lou."

"I don't wanna talk about it," Louis tried to slide off the bed but Liam's grip on his arm stopped it.

"Louis," Liam said, "Please."

Louis slumped at the spot he was at, his legs dangling off the corner of the bed, right next to Harry's long legs.

Louis swallowed, the memories flashing behind his eyes.

The bathroom.

His fuzzy vision.

What happened after with Lisa.

Her warning.

Her threats.

_"It's bad press and there's no way I'm letting your reckless drinking get in the way of ruining the band. You already have your status to hide, I can't believe you've added another thing to the list."_

"Something... happened, but it's dealt with already."

_No, it wasn't._

Louis was facing away from them, it seemed easier that way.

Still, he felt the tension start to rise among hi- the pack.

 _They're not your pack, Louis_.

The hand Liam had wrapped around Louis' bicep tightened as he pulled Louis closer to the middle of the bed.

_They could be._

His hold seemed to numb away the tainted bruised skin the Alpha had left the night of the incident.

Louis didn't know to shake off his arm or move closer. He didn't have a chance to choose before Niall grabbed him and pulled him in between his legs. Niall was like a koala, wrapping his legs around Louis' waist, and his arms around his shoulders. Louis felt himself go pliant against Niall. His back was pressed against Niall's chest and he felt each breath Niall took.

Liam's hand was still placed on his arm but it was placed lower, near his elbow. Louis' anxiety slipped away a little bit. Just a little.

"What happened, Louis-love? You can tell us," Niall cooed, trying to ease Louis out of his shell of discomfort.

"I can't," Louis said weakly.

"Why not?"

"I _can't_."

The silence stretched out between the five of them and Niall tightened his hold on Louis.

"Is that why you've been acting so different?" Liam felt the guilt biting at the corners of his mind. Liam doesn't know whats harder. Hurting Louis for not caring, or hurting Louis for trying to protect his pack. But Louis is pack. Maybe not the way a normal pack should be but he's pack nonetheless. All five of them have been through everything together and up until the four of them decided to take it further, that was when Louis became distant. Louis doesn't trust them like he used to.

In the end, it was always Liam that pushed Louis away and right now is the prime example of Louis not trusting them.

Liam's heart jumps at the thought of Louis not trusting them and he tightens the hold he has on Louis' arm.

"Do you trust us?" Zayn asked tentatively like he was reading Liam's mind.

"Yes, of course, I do!" Louis almost gave himself whiplash at how fast he turned his head towards Zayn.

"Okay, then tell us when you're ready," Liam said before Zayn could open his mouth again. Zayn left the words to die in his throat as he shared a glance with Liam.

 _Not now,_ Liam mouthed.

"Okay," Louis mumbled. As soon, as the words fell from his lips, the tension in the room ceased.

Niall was the first to break the ongoing silence.

"Can someone order lunch already? I'm starving," he whined, cuddling into the back of Louis' neck.

Louis snorted as Niall's stomach growled and also at how fast the Alphas got a hold of room service. Soon, the room was filled with steaming carts of food which didn't last more than thirty minutes.

Louis wished he could be a part of this every day but it is what it is.

And it's better to be safe than sorry. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i didn't know how to end this chapter so i just included louis' tattoo woops :) i hope you like this chapter and so sorry for the late update, i'll try to write quicker omg xx
> 
> edit: IM SO HAPPY TO HAVE SUCH WONDERFUL READERS, I LOVE YOU ALL SO MUCH !!


	5. pulling me back into the flames

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> recap: the pack feels that there's something wrong with louis but louis isn't going to tell them

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so i wrote this chapter while listening to harry's album and eating fruit loops. yes, that is my life. i just wanna take a second to say thank you so much for all your sweet comments, im so glad you're liking this story! it's my first a/b/o fic so it means a lot! also, thank you for 192 kudos omg that's incredible :') anywayyy, happy reading!! xx
> 
> p.s. i edited this in like 10 minutes so all typos are mine rip

 

The two days of the break were finished just as quickly as they started. Niall didn't let Louis out of his sight and Louis felt somewhat guilty about it. The alphas were aching to get their Omega in their arms again and Louis knew it was his fault that Niall wasn't paying that much attention to them. He couldn't really blame them 

If there was anything Louis learned in school, it was that Alphas needed to give their attention to their Omega even when they don't ask for it. For Alphas, it was more of a "let me take care of you, god dammit it's my job" which, in Louis' defense is quite hilarious. 

Louis probably shouldn't laugh at the Alphas struggles considering the fact they're letting them borrow Niall. 

Oh, well, they can't read his mind anyway. 

Niall being attached to Louis' hip also made it hard for Louis to take his suppressants and put on his scent neutralizer spray but he managed to make a few escapes to his hotel. Louis' foot was still sprained and they (Niall), unfortunately, made him take some painkillers even though it went against his nature. The pain grounded him but the painkillers limited him to the feeling of only the pain of his scratches on his thighs for a few minutes. It was enough to keep him from breaking down crying in the middle of the hallway, so, he'd say it was working out kind of well. Kind of. 

Louis was in the dressing room getting his hair done and it wasn't an easy feat getting the dressing room to himself. Louis had to literally drag Niall (more like trying to make it look like he was hopping on his good leg instead of his bad one) out of the dressing room and into the kitchen because the Alphas were fuzzing about Niall not eating anything before the small interview they were going to have before the show. 

The grateful looks he got from the Alphas made it a little bit easier to give Niall back. 

Not really but Louis can't really keep the pack apart for that long. 

Louis was humming as Lou fixed up his hair, putting in a whole bunch of products just for his hair to stay to the side. His hair has gotten a bit too long and too much fluffiness made his hair look soft but messy. 

He needs a haircut but Lou says it looks fine. Whatever. 

The moment Lou finished his hair, Niall barged in with his Alphas hot on his tail. 

"Watch the hair!" Lou shrieked as she watched Niall throw himself at Louis who was barely getting off his seat. They put a chair in front of him with a pillow and made him put his leg on it with an ice pack. He really didn't care, it didn't hurt as much and he doesn't know if he misses the pain or if he's just glad they're gonna stop bothering him about it. (The last one's a lie). 

"Louis! How's your foot?" Niall asked. 

Louis huffed as Niall dragged him to sit on the couch. "I'm fine, it doesn't hurt anymore." It does but he's not going to say that to Niall's face. 

"You're still gonna sit while on stage, though," Harry chimed in. 

Louis groaned, "That's boring!"

"Well, too bad," Niall said, messing up Louis' hair which resulted in a groan from their stylist. 

"C'mon, lads, the interviewer is waiting," Liam said, standing by the door and waiting for all four of them to get out before apologizing to Lou and closing the door. 

The interviewer was a petite mated Omega. She was sweet enough, asking questions about their oncoming album, life on tour, and of course, the pack. Louis kept quiet, knowing that if he opened his mouth, he'd be asking for a death wish from Lisa. It was getting easier to handle in Louis' opinion but that doesn't mean it didn't hurt. 

It was nearing the end of the hour long interview and the last questions were from the fans. 

"Laura from Manchester wants to know your _exact_ height, Louis," the interviewer asked with a small laugh. She looked at the card again and added on, "She capitalized everything except the word 'exact' so I'm guessing it's pretty important that you answer honestly." 

Louis threw his hand in the air, jokingly. "I'm 5'8 and a half! Why can't anyone believe that?"

Niall snorted, "Cause you're not." 

Zayn snickered beside him while Harry bit his lip to try and hide the oncoming laugh building in his throat. 

"And a half?" Liam raised an eyebrow. 

Louis rolled his eyes, "Yes, Liam, and a half." 

The interview moved on to the other fan questions before they got carried away about something as controversial as Louis' height. 

"And, that's it!" The Omega interviewer said as she sat the stack of note cards on the table beside her. 

The cameraman stopped filming once the band said their thank you's and then they were getting up to head back to their dressing room. They still had an hour and a half before their show started and Niall said he was going to use that time to take a nap. 

"Louis, you coming?" Zayn asked as Louis started walking in another direction. 

"Huh? Oh yeah, um, I have to do something first," Louis said. He didn't really think Niall was inviting him to the nap session but, he really did need to get something done. 

"No, you don't, you're coming with us," Niall said, already making his way towards Louis. 

"No, no, I'll be there I just have to have a talk with Lisa." That was half a lie. He felt like needed to douse himself in another bottle of scent neutralizer spray because he felt like the close proximity of the Alphas and the Omega is making his pheromones go everywhere. He wasn't used to being so close to other Alphas and Omegas. Not as frequent as two days straight anyway. And he did need to ask Lisa something about his suppressants. 

Niall pouted but sighed, "Fine, but if you don't make it in half an hour, I'm coming to get you myself! And be careful with your foot!"

Louis looked down and saw he was pressing all his weight on his sprained ankle. He switched his weight to his other leg to stop Niall from screaming at him but once Niall and his Alphas left, he pressed his weight back to his hurt ankle. 

He made his way to turn around the corner and into the hallway but ended up crashing into someone. 

"Fuck, Sor-" Louis was cut off as he looked up the face the stranger. But it wasn't a stranger.

It was the Alpha. 

_The_ Alpha.

 Louis felt his breath get caught in his throat as goosebumps rose on his skin. The Alpha made no move to advance on Louis, just let a neutral expression ease its way over his face. 

"You okay, Louis?" Louis broke away from his trance of shock to see the Omega interviewer on the side of the Alpha. 

"S-sorry, yeah, I- yeah," Louis stuttered. 

She had a worried expression on her face. Lorena. That was her name. 

"You sure?" She repeated. "Noah turned a bit too fast on this corner, sorry." 

Louis' eyes trailed down to see her hand was intertwined with the Alpha's and then his eyes flickered up to her neck where a claimed mark was and suddenly everything clicked. 

He was _mated_. 

To a sweet, petite Omega that doesn't deserve to find out the truth of what her Alpha has done. 

Mated but still tried to _mark_ Louis and violated him. 

He could've killed his Omega if he had marked Louis with his teeth!

_Why is he here?!_

"S-sorry, I have to-" Louis didn't even try to finish his sentence before he rushed out and instead went down the other hallway and into the office he knew his manager was to be. 

He had no one to go to at this point and he just needed _answers_. And the only one that can give them to him is Lisa. 

He knocked frantically at Lisa's door until she opened it because fuck it, he's tired of this shit already. 

Lisa swung the door open and gave Louis an annoyed look,"What is it, Louis?" 

"Why is he here?" His voice was higher than his normal pitch but he could care less. He can't function knowing his attacker was in the same building as him. 

"Who?"

" _Him_."

Lisa furrowed her eyebrows until she got who Louis was talking about. When she did, she let out a small laugh. 

_Laughed_.

Who the fuck does that?!

"What the fuck is so funny about that? Did you tell him to come here? To make sure I didn't say anything to the pack? Because fucking hell, I got your point! I don't understand why brin-" 

Louis' rant got cut off as she pulled him in as quick as she could and locked the door in a heartbeat. 

She towered over him and Louis' surge of confidence was replaced with his anxiety and fear of what the actual situation brought. 

"Shut up and listen here, Louis! That man out there is in charge of giving all our employees, including you, their money to make sure _your_ ass doesn't go broke. He overlooks every single penny we get from the band and distributes it to Modest!  _and_ to you so if you say _anything_ about what happened _,_ say goodbye to all your money and respect and instead be hated by everyone working on the fucking tour including your beloved bandmates. Get that?" She let her Alpha command slip into the last two sentences knowing Louis would believe and follow her every word. 

Louis was stunned into silence, feeling smaller than he actually was and nodded numbly. Her Alpha command sent shivers down his spine and he swallowed down the whine threatening to come out of his throat. He feels so pathetic and weak. 

_Listen to her because if you don't, you're adding another thing to her list of disappointments._

"I understand," Louis whispered weakly. 

"Good," she huffed. She straightened up the collar of her white buttoned up shirt and adjusted her suave brown pencil skirt. "The show starts in an hour, don't fuck up your lyrics this time. _Now leave_." 

He didn't make a sound as he walked out the door and down the hallway. 

He doesn't want to live like this. He doesn't want to live at all if this is what life has to offer him. He doesn't want to keep hiding from the people he loves but he doesn't know if he can handle the pain of them hating him even if he does tell them the truth. 

Countless of times he's heard Liam, Zayn, Harry, and Niall say honesty is the key to a healthy relationship. Louis can't even be _honest_ with them, how are they going to accept him if he can't even say anything? Lisa made sure his mouth was kept shut with her Alpha command and Louis has never felt more hopeless. 

He _wants_ to tell him but how?

Louis sniffed as he rubbed his nose against the sleeve of his sweater. He isn't going to cry. He can't. Or else people will ask questions and he doesn't trust himself or his voice at the moment. 

_Just keep pretending you're okay and maybe one day you will be._

Yeah, maybe.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay to be fair here, i literally came up with that plot twist on the spot like i was about to eat a spoonful of my fruit loops and then bAM i got hit with that twist. you're welcome :') THIS IS WHERE IT ALL GOES DOWNHILL, HOLD ON TO UR SEAT FELLAS !


	6. when you've had enough, you could run

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> recap: louis encountered the alpha. how will he deal with it?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if you haven't noticed, i've been using song lyrics for the chapters :') i listened to "run" by lewis watson while writing this and let me tell you.... i was in my FEELINGS. this is the big reveal,,, it took me 5 (11k) chapters cause the angst was getting too much even for me !! i hope i don't disappoint omg i edited the hell out of this chapter so let's hope there's no errors/typos! anyway, happy reading!! xx

  
"There you are! Where were you?" Niall hurriedly went to grab Louis' hand as Louis opened the door to the dressing room. 

Louis had been aimlessly walking down the same hallway before one of the venue security guards had noticed and asked him if he was lost. Louis hurriedly said he was fine before making his way down to the dressing room. He may or may not have forgotten that the rest of the boys were in there too. With everything going on, he seemed to forget a lot of things these days. 

Louis swallowed down the panic threatening to show and gave a half-ass attempt at a smile. 

“Some things came up,” Louis shrugged, pulling his hand away from Niall’s. It got him a weird look from the blonde but he didn’t have a chance to open his mouth before Lou took Louis away and into a seat to fix his hair.

“What things?” Niall pushed for more, following Louis even as he sat down. Niall just pulled a chair from the side and sat next to Louis, attentive blue eyes roaming over Louis' face. 

“Just… stuff,” Louis mumbled as he closed his eyes when Lou sprayed some hair product too close to his eyes. Lou didn’t even bother to apologize and she just continued to fix up his messy hair. He really needed that haircut. 

“That doesn’t make anything clearer,” Niall deadpanned. 

“It wasn’t supposed to.” 

Niall scoffed. “Then why did you take almost an hour supposedly sat in a chair talking to our management? Did you get in trouble?” 

_I can’t tell you because my suppose attacker is in this venue and I don’t feel safe knowing he can come in here any moment and take me away. Especially since Lisa probably has him on speed-dial._

Louis didn’t say that though. Instead, he set for a simple response. “That wouldn’t surprise anyone.” 

Even the thought of the Alpha confronting Louis made him shiver uncomfortably. He has never been touched inappropriately like he was that night and nothing can compare to the chilling fear of being helpless in a situation that probably happens too much to Omegas on a daily basis. It disgusted him. 

Niall let out a snort and shook his head. “Fine, don’t tell me. I’ll figure it out myself.” 

Louis felt his heart rate pick up with that statement. Surely Niall wouldn’t ask Lisa anything, right? That could just show Lisa that Louis was doing a shit job at being quiet about this whole situation. Even then, Niall is good at getting what he wants and he  _could_  find something out if he wanted to. But  he wouldn't. Louis wouldn't let him. 

Louis’ mouth suddenly felt dry as he stared at Niall’s smug grin. But how? Louis was trying really hard not to show his panic again. 

Maybe Niall was joking? 

Louis’ eyes flickered to a movement behind Niall and he made eye contact with Liam who was on the couch, jotting things down in his song book. Liam’s eyebrows were furrowed, clearly listening in on Niall’s and Louis’ conversation.

_For fuck's sake._

Louis looked away and went back to looking at Niall. 

“Have fun with that,” he managed to get out as Lou finished up putting some setting spray in his hair. 

“20 minutes until show time, boys,” Paul said as his head popped into the dressing room. He left as quickly as he came and left the boys to groan in protest. Everyone but Louis. 

He was still thinking about Niall’s words even as they put in their ear pieces and made their way to the stage. 

_Am I being too obvious?_

_No,_ Louis thought, _I'm not._

-

Louis was exhausted. The show took away any energy he had left and all that was left was an empty shell of himself. He tried extremely hard to put his all in that show to not disappoint Lisa, his team, the fans, and the boys. He couldn’t handle another lecture from Lisa, knowing she could bring  _him_  in anytime she wanted and use it as an advantage. 

It didn't help that his hips would get super sensitive at random times. A chill that would spread up towards his chest and leave him shivering for a few seconds. He tried his hardest to contain the trembles.

This time, after the show, Louis was taken into the tour bus with the rest of the boys. The familiar scents managed to calm a small part of his fears but not entirely. He still had that nagging feeling in the back of his mind telling him to be alert and awake.

It was so sudden and unusual that Louis felt like he needed to look out the window to check his surroundings every few minutes. 

When Louis pulled away the curtains to look outside for the 7th time in the last twenty minutes, Harry let out a small chuckle from the table in the small kitchen. 

“Lou, what are you doing?” Harry looked amused, completely abandoning the toast he had on his plate to focus on Louis. 

Louis didn’t find it funny. But Harry doesn’t know what’s going on in Louis’ life. And that’s Louis’ fault. 

Right. 

“Just checking,” Louis hummed, his hip suddenly tingling again. 

_What the fuck?_

Harry was unaware of Louis’ uncomfortable sensations and the curly-haired Alpha hummed back, turning to take a bite out of his healthy toast. 

Louis shifted on the couch trying to adjust to the new feeling. It was like electric wires were being brought down on his skin in sharp jabs and he had to bite back the gasp that was threatening to spill past his lips. 

He managed to get off from the couch and make his way to the small bus bathroom, Harry paying no mind to him. When he locked the bathroom door, Louis quickly pulled up his hoodie and ran his hand over the chilling skin. 

The bruises he had gotten from a few days ago were purple but Louis noticed something different about them. There was one deep cut, probably an inch wide digging into the bruise. It was like someone dug their nail into his skin and left an ugly excess of skin on the corners. 

It was unnoticeable before since Louis was too distracted by the pain and reality of the situation but now that he looks at it, it’s clear what the Alpha had done. 

He’d left an imprint. 

Not close to a bonding mark, no, but enough that Louis was somehow connected to the Alpha. 

_Connected._

An imprint is only left when an Omega is in distress or too far gone to pay attention to anything around them. An Alpha then leaves a deep cut on the Omega’s skin, not meaning to hurt at all, which fills the omega with a sense of calm and safety. It’s sort of like a reminder that they’re not alone in their situation. It could be a bite, nails digging into their skin, or a scratch. 

Usually, only an Alpha mated to their Omega can put an imprint since only Omega are capable of being marked, but in rare occasions, if an Alpha imprints on an unmated Omega, instead of causing the feeling of safety and calm, it creates a replica of the emotion the Omega is feeling in that current moment. Hence, why it worsens the condition of said Omega. 

It's the relationship the Omega has with the Alpha that determines what the outcome of the imprint will be. If the Omega trusts the Alpha then it will most likely create that sense of calm. But if the Omega feels endangered or threatened by the Alpha, then things could turn ugly fast. Only a trusted Alpha can reverse the scarring imprint left on an Omega by an irresponsible Alpha. It's a tricky mark which is why it's rarely done among the community. 

Louis stared at the mark, something building up in his chest, constricting his airway and leaving him breathless just like he felt that day of the incident. 

He was imprinted. 

That cut was to stay there for weeks, even more. If it was a normal imprint, it would’ve stayed for hours, a day maybe. 

But no, Louis was stuck with the stupid mark that wouldn’t stop reminding him of the cold chilling of fear. Being breathless, hopeless, so  _defeated_.

 _No, no, no, this_ can’ _t be happening. Not today, not ever! This isn’t supposed to be a th-_

“Louis, what the fuck are you taking so long for?” 

Louis jumped, his breath hitching as Niall banged on the door loudly, the door knob rattling. Louis felt his heart beating all the way in his throat as he turned towards the door. 

Louis gulped as he pulled down his sweatshirt, trying to calm down his racing heartbeat. How is he supposed to act okay after this? He doesn’t know how he’s going to get through this knowing he has a mark on skin proving he’s an  _Omega_ and having a reminder that he’s such a fucking  _idiot_  for not being able to keep it from happening! 

How much more fucking weak can he get?!

“Louis! Seriously!” 

Louis hastily turned on the sink, splashed water on his face and dried himself with the inside collar of his sweatshirt before opening the door. He has to get a hold of himself, damn it. If not, who else would do it for him? 

Niall was there, an agitated expression on his face as he took in Louis’ pale complexion. 

“What? Am I that ugly?” Niall said, rolling his eyes as he pushed past Louis and into the bathroom. 

Louis didn’t get a chance to reply before the door shut roughly behind Louis. 

“You caught him at a wrong time!” Zayn yelled from the lounge room. 

“Yeah! He gets grumpy when he doesn’t get enough sleep!” Liam added, from god knows where on the tour bus. 

 _This is good_ , Louis thought.  _They don’t think anything’s wrong. That’s good._

Louis stopped the “ _No it isn’t_ ” that was trailing behind his silent monologue as he took in a large breath of air. 

“Yeah, I’ve noticed,” Louis managed to reply back as he noticed he took a second too long in his wandering mind. 

_This is good. It has to be._

-

It wasn’t good. 

It took Louis four shows and five breakdowns for Louis to realize it was bad. The imprint got worse as the days went by. Any small graze against it set Louis trembling and shaking with the memories. Louis blamed it on the “cold” he had gotten from traveling but even then, he still had to hide out in a storage closet for his body to calm down from the shivers. 

Louis just wanted to get rid of it already. Sometimes, he found himself scratching at the mark before realizing it only made it worse. The cold that overcame his body made his teeth chatter and not even the warmest of sweaters could ease his discomfort. 

Louis just wanted to sleep. Because when he’s asleep, he’s numb and unaware of what’s happening to his body. He used to crave pain, wanting to feel punished for how dishonest he’s been with the boys but he’s getting tired of it. 

Tired of the lies, tired of the pain, tired of trying to keep his status a secret when everything he’s ever wanted was just a doorway away. How long does this have to go on for? Until the band breaks up? Until Lisa isn’t in charge of him anymore? Until he’s on his deathbed? 

He doesn’t know. Everything is just so blurry and uncertain. He doesn’t know what to expect and Louis thinks it’s because of the mark since the mark  _is_  meant to remind him of the emotions he felt that night. 

But it’s getting harder to separate his current emotions with the imprint emotions. Is he anxious because he’s scared they’re going to find out? Is he anxious because any moment now,  _he_  could storm in at any moment? 

Or are the chilling trembles warning signs for his body to take a break? Is he actually cold or is the cold just a reminder of the dread filling his chest when he realized he couldn’t control his own body? 

At that thought, the imprint burned with a chilling frost that sent goosebumps all the way to his neck. 

“ _Fuck_ ,” Louis hissed out as quietly as he could. 

They (the boys) were in the middle of a writing session, everyone but Louis messing around and creating stupid lyrics to the melodies. Louis had accidentally pressed the guitar too close to the imprint, the oversensitivity making the feeling worse over time. 

He maybe had a few minutes before the chills spread out throughout his entire body  _if_ his time hasn’t decreased or changed from before. 

He set the guitar on the floor next to him and took a deep breath, air only making the shivers spread faster. With shaky fingers, he gripped the end of his hoodie and stood up, catching the attention of the others in the room. 

“I got to use the loo,” Louis mumbled, sweat starting to gather at his hairline. 

_Fuck, fuck, fuck-_

“Hey, you don’t look good, Lou. You haven’t for the past few days,” Niall pointed out, making everyone nod along with him. 

“I just need to take a p-painkiller,” Louis managed to get out through his now chattering teeth. Louis mentally cursed himself for his stuttering, just wanting out of the room. 

“You’re shaking,” Liam said. 

“T-Thanks, Mr. Obvious,” Louis said, as he got to the door and placed his shivering hands on the doorknob.

_Be a Beta, be a Beta._

“Louis,” Zayn said, with a faint command on the edges. It was enough to make Louis freeze on the spot, making his imprint blaze with burning ice. 

Louis gripped the doorknob harder, his breath hitching at the sudden burn. 

“Why are you grabbing your hoodie like that?” Niall questioned him, his eyes locked on the hold Louis had on his hip. 

“W-what?” Louis looked down to see his hand gripping his hip, his nails digging into the fabric of his hoodie. He hadn’t even noticed. He let go only to realize that he had made holes with his extended nails in his hoodie and even into the shirt he was wearing. 

Louis heard Niall’s gasp a second too late before he realized that the holes were stretched out wide enough to reveal the imprint on Louis’ pale skin. 

_No no no no no._

Louis wrenched the door open and stumbled out, his legs working on his own as he ran down the hallway until he made it far enough to where his secret hideout was. The pathetic storage room seemed smaller than usual as Louis' feet gave out as he pressed his back against the cold wall. His skin was colder than the chilling stone. 

It seemed worse now that he was alone in the locked room with only his thoughts to keep him company. He was _stupid_ to think this could work out. It was only a matter of time before the imprint took control over his body and made him a shivering mess of fear and coldness. He can’t hide an imprint for fuck’s sake!

He should’ve known. Now he’s really going to get it. 

Louis’ could barely get air into his lungs, each breath a staggering stab of pain spreading throughout his veins. It was like the cold was towering over him, taunting him as it took away the little energy he had left in his small frame. 

Is this how he’s going to go down in history? 

Louis Tomlinson, revealed Omega, frozen to death as unknown imprint took over his body in an ongoing investigation. 

_Pathetic, worthless, useless, stup-_

“Hey, Louis, c’mon. You’re okay. You’re fine.”

Louis gasped out a breath as he opened his eyes. When did he close them? His blurry vision cleared as he saw a pair of worried green eyes staring right back at him. Harry was kneeling in front of him. 

“There you go, love,” Harry cooed as Louis felt a warm hand press against his cold cheek. Why isn’t he running away from him? Has he put the pieces together yet? 

“You’re freezing,” Harry mumbled as his warm palm slowly started to slowly but surely warm up Louis’ chilling skin. 

Louis shook his head, his throat clogging up at how careful Harry was being with him. Why is he helping him? Wasn’t he ignoring him? He  _should_  be ignoring him!

Louis managed to clear his mind to let a few words pass his lips, “’m f-fine.”

Harry looked broken as those shaky words managed to come out of Louis. How dare Louis make this sweet Alpha look so upset? It doesn’t fit him.

“You don’t have to lie anymore, Lou. I know-  _We_  know what that imprint means,” Harry corrected himself, unaware of the panic building up in Louis’ chest. “You’re an Omega.”

“Y-you c-can’t- I’m n-not!” Louis’ panic was getting stronger as he realized what that meant. Lisa is going to  _kill_ him. Not literally- well maybe, but either way he’s dead meat! 

He lied. He lied for years. How can the boys trust him? How can anything go back to normal if they know what he is? They can’t know. He tried so hard to hide everything and to only watch it fall apart because of a stupid imprint? 

“No, Louis, stop. You’re making it worse,” Harry said softly, his big hands gripping Louis’ wrists where he was scratching at the imprint. Harry’s whole hand enveloped Louis wrists and he suddenly felt so small being reprimanded by the Alpha.

_Stupid, stupid, stupid._

“You’re not stupid, love,” Harry said as he slowly replaced Louis’ frantic fingers with his own warm ones over the bright red imprint. Harry was slowly placing his palm over the torn skin and Louis felt his vision darkening on the edges. 

“N-no, h-hurts,” Louis whined out, unable to move as he felt himself slump against the wall. 

“Shh, I know, Lou. It won’t when you wake up, I promise,” Harry hushed as he lessened the pressure he put against the imprint to try and keep Louis awake a little longer. 

_When I wake up?_

“Do you trust me?” Harry asked softly, his head ducking down to try and meet Louis’ gaze. 

Louis let out a stuttering breath as he looked into the eyes that he’s been trying to look at for more than a few seconds in the past few months. 

_Alpha.. trust.. Alpha_

Louis felt himself nod before he even came up with a response. 

“Good,” Harry sighed with relief, his nail grazing against the imprinted skin.

_Good. I’m good._

“You’re gonna be fine, love,” Harry said for the last time. 

And then it went dark. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> don't kill me pls....


	7. you must think that i’m a fool

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> recap: louis found out he was imprinted and the truth comes out

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it’s been two months i’m so sorry omg i honestly didn’t know how to put together this next chapter until someone reminded me that i started this fic to finish it so !!! here i am !! i hope i don’t disappoint but i barely edited this chapter so sorry if there’s any mistakes!!
> 
> also, all of you are so incredible thank you so much for sticking with me and supporting me; it makes me feel special <3 happy readings!! xx

 

  
"You with me, Lou?"

It was warm, so warm. Louis barely heard the words and when he did, it was already too late to answer. It's not like he could answer anyway.

"Louis?"

Where was he again? Before Louis could ponder on that thought, it was quickly replaced by a wave of calm and safety.

_Safe._

"He's still too far..."

The voice fades away and Louis doesn't know if they've just lost their train of thought or if he just stopped listening. It's probably the latter.

"What if... not too much... he okay?"

Louis feels like he's on a cloud, floating on an endless route to nowhere. He wants to stay like this forever. Nothing can reach him here. Maybe only the voices but they've been reduced to soft mumbles.

"Come back for me, love."

He feels his finger twitch. Then his nose. His eyes.

Then he sees blurry shapes. Is that...?

Louis blinks, disoriented.

"There you go, Lou."

Louis is quick to realize the warmth he was feeling are the arms wrapped around his body.

Wait, what?

Louis lets out a soft groan, shifting against the body pressed against him. The arms tighten around him and brush against a spot on his hip which turns Louis into a useless lump.

"Harry..." a voice warned.

"Fuck, sorry, I know," a voice cursed right next to Louis' ear.

Hands cup Louis' face and Louis' eyes blink open again to meet soft brown eyes. When did he close them?

_"You don't have to lie anymore, Lou. I know- We know what that imprint means," Harry corrected himself, unaware of the panic building up in Louis' chest. "You're an Omega."_

Louis jolted out of his daze, the faint memory burning deep into his skull as he remembered why he's so out of it in the first place.

Harry replaced the imprint with his own.

They know he's an Omega.

They _know_ he's an Omega.

They know he's an _Omega_.

The panic seized Louis in a heartbeat and he lurched forward despite the arms around him.

"D-don't hate m-me! I w-wanted to t-tell you, I-I did! B-but-," Louis' got cut off as fingers brushed against the fresh, bright imprint and he slumped backward into Harry's chest.

" _Harry_ ," Liam warned again, a frown appearing on his face as he was forced to let go of the hold he had on Louis' face.

"Sorry, sorry, I just-sorry," Harry mumbled as he adjusted Louis so he's more comfortable.

Liam kept his distance, knowing how fragile the whole situation was. Louis could've died if it wasn't for Harry. Yeah, the new imprint made things a bit more complicated and dangerous but it's better than having Louis six feet under.

The thought made a shiver run down Liam's spine and he moved a bit closer to the pair, a flare of protectiveness starting in his chest.

Louis let out another whine, his eyebrows furrowing that made Liam take his step back.

Liam bit his lip,"We have to call a doctor."

Harry tensed, before relaxing, "We can't let this out."

"We won't," Liam said.

Harry nodded, "Okay. That's- okay."

Liam nodded, maybe to reassure himself and Harry, and pulled out his phone before walking out the storage closet Harry found Louis in.

Instantly, he was swarmed by an anxious Niall. Zayn, who was trying to calm Niall down, seemed to be on the brink of losing his mind too yet he was composing himself for the sake of Niall and the pack.

"Is he okay? Is he hurt? Who did that to him!? Liam, I swear-" Niall started but was stopped by Liam placing a hand on the back of his neck and bringing his other hand to his cheek.

Niall's breath stuttered as he tried to stop his heartbeat from racing a hundred miles per hour.

"Hey, hey, hey. Niall, calm down, love. He's fine, okay?" Liam pressed his forehead against Niall's, knowing the simple touch would ease the frantic omega.

"A-are you sure?" Niall whispered, the closeness of his Alpha calming him down.

Liam stared into the light blue eyes of his Omega and he felt himself fall deeper in love all over again. "I'm sure, Ni."

Niall nodded slowly, his breathing evening out again as the reassurance settled in his veins.

Liam pressed a soft kiss to his nose before passing Niall off to Zayn, who was staring at the storage door, a crease in between his eyebrows.

"Zayn," Liam said softly, a small smile appearing on his face as brown eyes met his. "He's okay."

Zayn hummed, letting Niall scent him as he nodded slowly at Liam's words.

Liam bit his lip, his phone feeling heavy in his hand. "I'm going to make a phone call. Are you okay being alone for a few minutes?"

Liam directed his question to Zayn, Niall too busy basking in the scent of his Alpha.

"Yeah, that's fine, Li. Go be daddy-directioner," Zayn smiled, trying to make the atmosphere lighter.

Liam shook his head, the smile on his face expanding. He pressed a loud wet kiss to Zayn's cheek as he passed him to head into the main hallway, Niall chuckling softly at his Alphas.

-

Their private pack doctor arrived an hour later. Louis had been going in and out of consciousness and every moment he spent awake were filled with rushed and panicked apologies.

The anxiety coming off of Louis was strong throughout the small room they moved to. Harry's own anxiety was threatening to spill over but Liam was there to anchor him.

Liam was somewhat worried about Harry. The Alpha was still young and the only imprint he's ever made was on Niall. Even then, Liam was there guiding him through the whole process. Now though, Liam can't do anything without making it worse for the both of them.

They needed a professional.

And that's how they found themselves with Dr. Spire placing his suitcase on the floor next to the door. He had a serious look on his face as he spotted Louis unconscious on the sofa, Harry seated on the floor right next to him.

"Harry, is it alright if I approach Louis?" Dr. Spire asked, knowing how protective he was at the moment.

Harry glanced at Louis, then at Liam, before nodding.

"Alright," Dr. Spire sighed, putting on gloves and holding a smaller box filled with instruments. He bends down next to Harry, a reasonably amount of space between them as he checks Louis' heartbeat, blood pressure, and other vitals.

Liam had spoken to Dr. Spire about the situation before-hand, making sure the conversation was confidential. What was worrying Liam about the incident was the fact that Louis' body was fighting against every urge of his Omega instincts. The suppressants blocked out any triggers that made him an Omega and the imprint was one of them.

Harry was quiet throughout it all, his attentive eyes on Louis. Zayn, Liam, and Niall were on the small couch in the room with their eyes trained on Louis as well. Their faces were pinched with worry.

  
"Do you know what kind of suppressants he was taking?" Dr.Spire asked, noting things down in a small notebook.

Liam cleared his throat, "No, he hasn't been awake long enough for us to ask."

Dr. Spire looked up. "Will you be able to find out for me? This is very important."

Zayn stood up, "I'll go get his bag, maybe he kept them in there."

Dr. Spire nodded.

"It's a good thing you replaced the imprint, Harry. Very brave of you," the doctor said once Zayn left the room.

Harry shook his head, "I didn't want him in more pain than he already was."

"No one does," Dr. Spire sighed, "It might be a bit difficult at first but it will become easier to balance the imprint you made on Louis with Niall. That brings up another question. Did you feel anything when Harry placed an imprint on Louis, Niall?"

Niall shook his head, "No. I think it's because I already considered Louis as part of our pack. I don't want anything happening to him."

Dr. Spire nodded again before turning towards Liam.

"Has he been eating?" Dr. Spire asked.

Liam paused a bit, guilt settling into his bones once he realized he doesn't really know. Niall instantly attached himself to Liam's side once he felt his Alpha's distress. Liam could tell you what Zayn ate last night, what movie Niall watched two days ago, and the song Harry's currently loving but he couldn't even answer if Louis' been eating. He's such a shit Alpha.

Dr.Spire noticed his slight hesitation and looked up from his note-taking. "He's a bit malnourished and dehydrated. That could be fixed easily but what I'm concerned about the type of suppressants he's been taking. And the effect the imprint is having on him."

Harry bristled at the mention of the imprint but he quickly relaxed his posture.

Liam bit his lip and he felt Niall shift beside him.

Dr. Spire jotted a few things down in his notebook again before folding it shut and standing up.

"It's a bit unclear on what the suppressants have done to his body without knowing which one of them he was taking," the doctor said, "At the moment, his body is fighting against his own instincts and it's taking longer for him to heal. Although the old imprint has been replaced, the number of Omega hormones it is taking for the new imprint to take place is too much for his body to handle. Hence, the reason why he can not stay awake for long periods of time. You said he has been slipping into Omega space?"

Harry nodded this time. "I can feel it."

Dr. Spire hummed, "That is a good thing. Omega space releases oxytocin, the main hormone of an Omega, which can help him restore the Omega hormones he is missing. His body knows there's something wrong and it's trying to speed up the process of healing him."

Zayn walked right back into the room at that moment, Louis' Adidas bag over his shoulder. He handed the bag to Liam who started to feel around the bag until he found a small slip on the inside. He stuck his finger in the small opening and the crinkle of pill packets filled the quiet room.

Soon, the small table in front of them was filled with over dozens of small, red, and circular pills.

Dr. Spire took a packet, opening it up before grabbing a bottle of water and placing a drop of water over the pill. Instantly, the pill turned blue and it dissolved on the table.

"The infamous purple pill," mumbled the doctor as the rest of them stared transfixed on the pill. "It's coloring was used to confuse officials on classifying it until they found out the secret behind it."

"Is it hurting him?" Niall whispered, scared of the answer.

Dr. Spire paused," Yes and no."

"Suppressents were built to pause or stop any Omega hormones being made excessively," explained the doctor. " This one, however, makes him vulnerable to many diseases that oxytocin protects him from but his reproductive system, scent glands, and the ability to mate are spared to some extent."

Niall tensed, the reality of the harm done to Louis making him sick. Who would do that to Louis? Was it his mother? His father?

"Will his body be able to function properly?" Zayn questioned, sitting on the armrest of the couch.

"It might take a few months for him to restore his hormones and instincts, but yes, his body will be able to function properly eventually."

Louis let out a small groan, Harry instantly standing up on his knees, to brush a stray strand of hair out of Louis' face.

"Hey, Lou," Harry hummed, "You with me, love?"

"Har..ry..." Louis mumbled.

"Is there anything we can do to help him?" Niall asked, eyes fixed on Louis.

"Don't let him take any more suppressants, switch his diet to something more nutritional, and make sure he drinks plenty of water," Dr. Spire said, packing up his suitcase. "I'll need to check up on him in a few days but as of right now, his vitals are stable. He just needs rest and time for his hormones to level out a bit."

Liam and Zayn nodded, Niall biting his nails as he watched Harry try to ease Louis out of his Omega subspace.

"Thank you, Doc," Liam lead the doctor out the door and shook his hand and then the five of them were alone again.

Louis let out a whine, barely reaching the surface of consciousness.

"C'mon Lou, I'm right here. I'm always here," Harry whispered, petting Louis' cheek.

The soft touch of the Alpha coaxed Louis out of his small daze and his eyes blinked open, squinting against the bright light.

"There you go, such pretty eyes, baby," Harry cooed, hoping to calm Louis before he sends himself into a panic.

"'m sorry," whimpered Louis and Harry was quick to shush him.

"You have nothing to do be sorry for. You did nothing wrong, lovey," Harry said.

"B-but I-"

"No, listen to me, babe. You're good, you're so good, okay? We'll figure everything out and everything will be alright. You have nothing to worry about."

The soft hum of Harry's voice had Louis preening and he felt the oncoming panic attack disappear into a sense of calm.

Louis could barely remember why he was in the room or why Harry was being so nice to him but he finds himself not caring. He's wanted this for so long. The calm was overpowering him and it felt so addicting being able not to worry about anything.

He finally felt safe and he didn't care if it was temporary.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if you’re confused about anything, please ask!! this was literally just louis’ consult and stuff so some things aren’t accurate at all since most of what i put in was lightly researched. i sometimes forget i’m in my own world and none of you are in it so questions are always welcomed!! xx


	8. i want to hold you; even if you say we can't

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> louis didn't expect this at all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> uhh... sorry for leaving for like half a year bsvkfj i honestly didn't expect so many people to like this story in such a short amount of time and im so sorry to keep you waiting! im currently getting ready for my quinceanera and i have a lot to prepare and im a bit nervous!! still, i was only able to quickly finish this up and i apologize for the short chapter. i've recently gotten into bts hence the english lyrics of blue side (j-hope) of this chapter,,, i listened to that song while writing this and i love it. this just turned really long uhh enjoy!! (this wasn't edited lol sorry hmu if u wanna help me out with that haha)

It was the next day when Louis was finally lucid. The past day was filled with an anxious and fearful Louis, the Alphas (mostly Harry) trying to calm him down without overwhelming him with their pheromones. It didn’t help that Louis couldn’t stay awake long enough to get anything done since his body was so overworked. Niall was the most worried, ordering all the Alphas out of the room just so he could make Louis drink some water and eat a protein bar (the only thing Louis could keep down).

The whole time Niall was shushing him, bringing the bottle of water to his lips with hushed whispers. Niall noticed that Louis seemed to be calmer and awake when the Alphas were waiting out in the hallway.

So, that’s how they are now; Louis cuddled up to the Omega’s side, his eyes fluttering open while the Alphas were pacing outside the door.

His imprint wasn’t as intense as before, his body probably knowing that Harry was nearby. Niall knows how it feels when your Alpha isn’t near, he could barely imagine how it would feel for Louis considering his body isn’t used to the Omega hormones. But, being so close to Alphas made Louis’ body be so worn out that he couldn’t even stay awake.

“Hey, love,” Niall whispered softly, his fingers threading through the other Omega’s hair. “How are you feeling?”

Louis let out a small whine, feeling so tired even though he just woke up. “M’sorry.”

Niall decided to take a different approach to the apology. Niall kept petting Louis’ hair, turning his head to rest his cheek on the top of Louis’ head, “What are you sorry for, Lou?”

“For-for not telling you,” Louis sniffed, his lower lip wobbling. “I wanted to, I really did! But- but, I was scared.”

Niall felt his heart break. He felt anger pooling in his gut to the people who made him so scared, but he pushed it back. This is about Louis. And how people manipulated him into thinking he had no one.

“That’s not your fault, baby. What matters is that you tried,” Niall said, pulling the vulnerable Omega closer to him. “All those things those people told you are all false. We care about you so, so, much.” Niall sat up and adjusted Louis so he’s straddling his lap.

“But- I was bad,” Louis wiped the back of his hand against his eyes, tears falling down his cheeks.

“No, the people are bad. You, my love, are good. We love you just as you are. Omega or not, you’re our Louis,” Niall leaned forward to nuzzle his nose against Louis’, then, his cheek, lightly scenting him.

Louis sniffed again, his fingers trembling as he played with the hem of Niall’s shirt. Why isn’t Niall mad at him? He practically fed them lies! He can’t just let it go so easily, can he?

But Louis couldn’t help but lean into his touch, the Omega’s scent easing his worries.

“I don’t want you thinking about anything right now, okay?” Niall whispers softly, his hand softly gliding against the imprint on his hip.

“Can I bring the other Alphas in, Lou? Or just one?” Niall asks, slowly.

Louis shrugged, stuffing his nose into Niall’s neck. “All,” Louis mumbled, his voice muffled. He could feel the Alpha’s anxiety right through the door.

“Okay,” Niall’s voice was quiet, but he knew the Alpha’s were listening on the other side of the door. True to his word, the door was pulled open slightly by Zayn; Liam and Harry were behind him.

Louis bristled yet curled himself further into Niall’s touch.

Harry had a pained look on his face as he struggled to keep himself from running to the Omega. Being away from Louis caused an itch in his teeth and a burn in chest that he couldn’t explain. Liam and Zayn tried to keep him settled but it only agitated him more.

The only other Omega he had imprinted on was Niall, but Niall was always around him and his instincts were always settled.

Now, though, knowing Louis was in pain just a few feet away was worse than anything else in the world. He had to restrain himself.

“Hey, Louis.” Zayn’s voice was soft as he closed the door after Liam and Harry.

Louis only snuggled closer to Niall, his cheeks heated up with shame.

Oh, God. How is he going to face them?

Before Louis could send himself into a panic, Niall’s gentle hands on his back have him pushing those thoughts to the back of his head.

“Let’s watch Netflix,” Niall suggests, his tone clearly expressing that he isn’t taking any objections.

“Okay,” Liam shrugs, turning on the T.V. in front of them and pulling up Netflix.

Everyone follows without complaint, piling around in different places in the room.

Zayn took his seat on the floor, right by his Omegas’ feet. Harry followed suit, laying on the ground so he could rest his head and Zayn’s lap. Liam dug through one of the closets for blankets, gathering the fluffy cotton in his arms.

Soon, the lights of the room were dimmed, and the room was lit only by the bright glow of the T.V.

Louis was slightly confused by the turn of events. He expected to be scolded or even worse, told that it’s better for him to leave the band. Yet, none of those things have happened and he’s a bit relieved.

He could see Zayn’s hand running through Harry’s hair, his long fingers playing with the Alpha’s curls. Liam was seated right by Harry’s feet, his hand curled around his ankle.

He felt safe, the soft buzz of the movie making him feel warm combined with the heat of Niall’s body and the blanket.

With Niall’s hand rubbing his back, he felt himself drift off. His eyelids felt heavy and for the second time in the past few days, he let himself get lost in the feeling of safety, warmth, and _pack_.

Maybe this isn’t so bad after all.  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> what do you guys wanna see as this story progresses?? any specific scenarios?? ships?? conflicts?? i might create a separate collection of scenarios that didn't fit with the timeline after this fic is over... what do you guys think?


	9. sweet bliss

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> recap: the pack recently found out louis was an omega. their ways of dealing with it involve some nice pasta and some cuddles.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> haha...ha... so five months rlly went by right... can’t believe it’s been a year since i posted this fic omg. i haven’t been able to write a new chap since i really didn’t have any inspiration buuuut the fact that people are still reading this and leaving such wonderful comments really warms my heart :( i hope this filler (?) / fluffy chapter is enough of an apology :( its 3 am so ignore any typos; happy reading!

When Louis woke up about half an hour later, the movie was still playing at a low volume. He was still cuddled up to Niall on the couch but Liam and Zayn were no where to be seen.

He let out a small groan as a slight headache thrummed to his temple in short bursts. He brought a hand up to rub at the spot, the movement catching Niall’s eye.

“You okay, bub?” Niall asked softly, rubbing his hand up and down his back. Harry was already turning to look at him, brows furrowed in concern.

“Headache,” was the only word Louis mumbled out, eyes barely opened as the light only made the thrumming worse.

“The doctor said we couldn’t give you any painkillers. Sorry, Lou,” Harry said, guiltiness in his voice.

“Yeah, he said we have to let your body clean itself out from any type of drugs,” Niall explained, shifting to be in a better position in the couch. Louis just nodded numbly, not really paying mind to what they were saying.

He was feeling very… detached. It was like his mind was on another planet while his body was stuck on Earth in a daze. In his slight snooze, he caught slight words from the conversations the pack was having.

Something about letting him rest in his headspace or something.

Whatever. He’s too tired to figure that out anyways.

“M’ feel… spacey,” yawned Louis, eyes closing as he got lost in the soft pattern of Niall’s petting.

Niall let out a small giggle. “Yeah? Bet it feels nice, right?”

“Mhm,” hummed Louis, unconsciously stuffing his face right into Niall’s neck where his scent was the strongest. Niall only let out another set of giggles, his sweet and happy scent sending Louis into some type of pheromone high.

“Fuck, he’s so cute,” Harry breathed out, resting his his head on his hand, elbow propped up on the couch where he was sat on the floor.

Niall let Louis do all the scenting he wanted, the blonde’s own inner Omega preening at the fact that he had such a soft and vulnerable Omega right in his lap. It’s like his instincts are already sated knowing Louis wasn’t holding back with himself and was finally getting better (albeit, slowly).

There was a soft knock at the door and Zayn emerged with food in his hands. It was all healthy; fruits, vegetables, wheat bread, soups, whole-grain pastas. Anything that’ll help fill up Louis’ tummy with proteins.

Louis seemed oblivious to the door opening, nose bumping at Niall’s scent gland softly as he doused himself in the blonde’s scent.

“You’re back soon,” Harry noted, standing up to help the Alpha with setting up the food on the table.

“Well, yeah,” Zayn answered, unwrapping a bowl of pasta. “I didn’t want to leave him alone for too long.”

Harry hummed, “Where did Liam go?”

“He went to talk with Management about this whole thing. He’s already found out from an anonymous source who put Louis through all this,” Zayn said, failing to hide the slight anger in his voice.

Louis let out a small noise, noticing the shift in the Alpha’s voice but Niall was quick to hush him.

“Be careful,” Niall scolded, “He’s super sensitive right now.”

Zayn nodded. “Right, sorry. I’m just—“ he let out a sigh, not wanting to get ahead of himself.

“It’s okay,” Harry said. “We’re all frustrated about this. Let’s just wait until Louis gets better to talk about this as a whole? I don’t want our emotions affecting his whole healing process.”

Zayn ran a hand through his hair, “I know. His pheromones are still adjusting to everything.” Zayn snuck a glance at Louis while he was in the middle of grabbing a fork. “You think he’s up for eating?” he asked Niall.

Niall shrugged. “I think he’s a bit too out of it to be honest. Trying wouldn’t hurt though.” He ran a hand through Louis’ hair, brushing back his long fringe.

“Lou? You hungry?” Niall asked, trying to get the drowsy Omega’s attention.

Louis’ nose did a cute twitch, head peeking out of the comfortable position he had buried in Niall’s neck. His nose seemed to pick up the smell of pasta and he shook his head with a frown.

Niall let out a small sigh, “Not even a little bit?”

Louis stubbornly shook his head, settling with hiding his face in Niall’s chest instead.

“Can you eat just a little bit for me? Please?” Niall asked sweetly, lips turned down in a pout as Zayn and Harry watched everything unfold with amusement.

“It’s some good pasta,” Harry added on, stealing Zayn’s utensil to scoop up some of the creamy carbs. “Very yummy,” Harry hovered the fork near Louis, mouth opening to try and get Louis to do the same.

Seeming like he was done resisting, Louis complied and his mouth was suddenly filled with tasteful pasta. He was only able to finish a little bit of the plate (it would come back up if he kept on eating) which was enough to satisfy the three wolves in the room. He was given some water to wash down the food and he felt sated.

It’s been a long time since Louis could relax and feel safe around the people he cared about the most. He wouldn’t say he didn’t feel safe around them but he wasn’t able to be so open and free without the fear of Lisa breathing down his neck. The overbearing Alpha would take any excuse to use her Alpha voice on him and it would physically hurt him to try and keep things hidden from everyone else.

He knew they still had a lot to talk about but Niall, Liam, Harry, and Zayn haven’t forced him to talk about it which he was thankful.

He wasn’t ready to just jump in and talk about everything that has happened in the past four years. He doesn’t think he’ll be able to just sit down and talk about everything as if it’s some story time. There’s stuff that’s happened that’s hurt him, left scars on his skin, burned his heart, ruined his whole _being_.

He doesn’t even know why they’re being so nice to him.

As if sensing his depleting mood, Harry tapped his cheek with his finger, clicking his tongue to get him out of his thoughts. “Hey, slow it down in there, okay? You’re gonna be fine.”

Zayn was munching away on some weird salad nobody but him likes, cheeks filled with vegetables and croutons. “Yeah, we aren’t going anywhere,” he said the words sounding muffled. Niall’s light scolding about ‘You’re gonna fucking choke, Zayn’ went unheard to Louis as he basked in the feeling of _belonging, pack, and love._

_Thank you_ , Louis thought, _for staying_.

**Author's Note:**

> please leave kudos/comments!! feedback is greatly appreciated!! more chapters to come, i promise!! :')
> 
> talk to me on tumblr :) @starbuckscal


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